Couples therapy, also known as relationship therapy, is a type of psychotherapy that focuses on helping couples to gain insight into their relationship, resolve conflicts, and improve their relationship satisfaction. When seeking couples therapy, it is essential to find a therapist who is qualified, experienced in working with couples, and a good fit for both partners.
Relationship problems can be complex and sometimes very destructive and limiting, with roots that may be traced to childhood difficulties. Couples therapy aims to help partners explore their difficulties, understand underlying patterns in their interactions, and develop healthier ways of relating to each other. It is not about assigning blame or determining who is “right” or “wrong,” but rather about facilitating open communication and fostering mutual empathy.
Outcomes can include a happier and more secure partner relationship, a better understanding of your own and your partner’s experience and feelings, and improved sexual intimacy. The outcome might also be a more amicable separation than would have been possible without therapy.
Couples seek therapy for a range of reasons. Some of the most common presenting problems are:
- Communication Breakdown: Difficulties in expressing needs, active listening, and understanding each other’s perspectives. This can manifest as frequent arguments, withdrawal, or feeling unheard. Persistent disagreements, power struggles, and destructive arguing styles that leave both partners feeling hurt, depleted and resentful.
- Lack of Intimacy: Emotional and/or physical distance, waning sexual desire, and a lack of closeness or connection.
- Infidelity and Betrayal: The aftermath of an affair, broken trust, and the process of rebuilding or deciding the future of the relationship.
- Suspicion and Jealousy: Feelings of insecurity, possessiveness, and a lack of trust in the partner.
- Financial Issues: Disagreements about money, spending habits, and financial stressors impacting the relationship.
- Parenting Differences: Conflicts arising from differing parenting styles, co-parenting challenges, and the impact of children on the couple’s relationship.
- Family Conflicts: Issues relating to extended family members that create tension within the couple relationship.
- Life Transitions: Stress and adjustment difficulties associated with events such moving, job loss, illness, retirement, or bereavement.
- Mental Health Issues: The impact of one or both partners experiencing depression, anxiety, or other mental health conditions on the relationship dynamic.
- Differing Goals and Values: Discovering significant discrepancies in life goals, values, or expectations for the future of the relationship.